Category: Random

Amidala Had A Baby: 2Pac Was To Audition For ‘Star Wars’


Imagine a world where 2Pac was a Jedi. People around the Cantina, pour a little liquor out.

This from the NY Daily News:

The Force may have been stronger in Tupac Shakur than previously known.

Death Row Records’ former Chief Engineer Rick Clifford said his former collaborator was set to audition for a role in 1999’s “Star Wars: Episode I” before his death.

The New York-born Shakur was supposed to read for the part of a Jedi that later went to Samuel L. Jackson, Clifford claimed, but was gunned down in Las Vegas on Sept. 13, 1996. Shakur was just 25 at the time of his death.

“It’s sad because ‘Pac found out that I worked for Brian Austin Green. who was on ‘90210,’ then he found out I was in some movies. So we always talked about his film career and stuff,” Clifford said in the interview with  posted late last week.

That makes all of this a bit better…




Check out the full exchange here.

Interview: What Not To Say On A First Date


Relationship Expert George Moufarrej is the author of “Sexual Euphoria: A Complete Guide For Men and Women“, and he believes some things are off-limits for a first date. In fact he has a list of things you shouldn’t bring up.

I disagree…so I invited him on to discuss it. I did it for you.

Relationship Expert George Moufarrej

Dear Departed Friend: Farewell Sugar Moms


Dear Departed Friend,

As fast as time moves, we selfishly always think we’ll have more. But the truth is that everything is finite, and the saddest among us are left with words unsaid.

My world stopped this morning when I heard you were gone. Others were there and I’m glad you had a hand to hold in the end, but I’m beside myself that I never got to give the goodbye that you deserve.

You were so kind to me. Unassuming and warm, filled with quirks and flaws that only made me love you more. You’ve been a part of my life for so long and there are things I will never forget.

Not everyone loved the way you would leave your dirty magazines around the bathroom, but I found it honest and endearing.

I wish you would have let me play your piano, but I understand why you didn’t. You more than made up for it with your hospitality, always leaving candy and toys out when we came over.

You were always there to lend an ear for all occasions. We would talk about love and life, comfortably nestled on your worn couch. New friends would be amazed by your bumper cars, but I always felt I knew you better than that.

I’ve introduced you to every important woman in my life since I was eighteen, because I knew how charming you were. To love me would be to love you. I even introduced you to the less important ones, until we decided those girls were better taken somewhere else.

All our late nights race through my mind today. The ones where we stacked PBRs along the wall, jumping frogs and spinning tops. I even remember the times when you used to invite me over for lunch. You knew Perogies were the way to my heart.

We would blast The Menzingers and The Animals. Sink into a good INXS tune and know this was only for us. I always admired your taste in music, and was thankful you shared.

In the end I guess I could have seen this coming. You became less available, only willing to see me on Fridays and Saturdays. You changed your name. You invited over some sketchy college kids, flat brims and bad attitudes. But I knew none of it wasn’t your choice. You were just trying to survive in a changing world.

With all the times you’ve been there for me, I wish I could have been there for you. Life is short and time is finite, but our memories will live forever.

Goodnight Sugar Moms.



I Did A Skype Interview With

Metro Joey Ritter

The folks at asked me to be a part of their Skype podcast. So if you ever wondered how “Metro And Gordon Do The Internet” came to be or who Mark Paul Gosselaar kinda looks like, then this is the video for you.

Check out more of Joey’s stuff here, or watch a fatter Michael sing Friends Forever to Mark Paul Gosselaar here.

Twenty Thirteen: A Singing Gorilla Musical


You’ve been humming “I Dreamed A Dream” since Christmas, and we already know when the Tigers usually come, so it’s time to replace that space in your mind with a Gorilla threatening you melodically.

Via AVByte

Dear Twenty Twelve

Dear Twenty Twelve,

Well it appears that you’ll be leaving soon, and I want to thank you for your time. If you’ll oblige though, there are a few things I wanted to share about our relationship before you leave.

I wanted to say them in person, but this just seems easier. I know face-to-face I would start to broach an uneasy topic and you would be like “but what about Gangnam Style and Channing Tatum?”, and we would never get anywhere. That’s always your way, so it’s best I just put this on paper and let you do with it what you will.

If I can just come right out and say, the truth is you’ve been kind of shitty these past couple months. I know that’s harsh, but I think if you search yourself you’ll find I’m right.

I mean really? What happened? It’s almost like you gave up. You were totally into this and then the wheels kind of fell off. You acted out, you broke promises, and were for the most part a jerk to be around.

Now before you stop reading, let me slow down. We did have our good moments. I think back about our talks of “Linsanity” and how we stayed up late watching the Olympics. You got super into politics and I felt like we really connected.

But, let’s be honest, you started making some odd decisions. And I know, it’s like all my friends tell me, “how did you not see this coming?”

Like when you took away Whitney Houston and introduced me to Honey Boo Boo? Or when you said “don’t worry, the Giants won’t win the Super Bowl”…and then you TOTALLY LET THEM WIN THE SUPER BOWL!

We started to fight a lot, and I think we both lost sight of what was important. We came into this relationship with wide eyes and open hearts. And I wanted to believe that we were on the right track. At times we were. But the last couple months has said a lot about you.

You lied about the election, said it was going to be close and I should pay attention. And while I was distracted you started inviting over friends that you know I’m not cool with. Like Hurricane Sandy and Dubstep. You got violent and had that weekend I don’t ever want to speak of again in Connecticut. Besides that, you hurt me personally with a lot of the things you said and did. When I called you on it, you were like “the worlds gonna end Friday!!!!”

It didn’t, and once again your dramatics have disappointed me.

I’ve done some soul-searching, and I’m ready to move on. I’m ready to forgive you for the things that you’ve done and celebrate the moments that brought us both joy. I’ve learned to not over think relationships like this, and to be happy with myself. I don’t try to figure things out quite as hard as I used to. I find it better to just take each moment for what it is, and know that the next one will be along shortly.

Honestly, you’ve taught me a lot. And I thank you for that.

I’ll remember you always. Not in the “gosh he was great” Davy Jones way, but in the “no seriously, in 20 years history will think Bush was a great President” way.


Michael Cerio

So A Corgi Gets In To A Rap Battle…

I am well versed in Corgi, but I was unaware they spit “hot fire”. And….sound a lot like Mike Skinner from The Streets.